International and Local Darts Championships

[Captain Shamrock]

Too good?

Gaffa,

It would be brilliant to see you soon. It has been ages. However, you might be too good for the circuit. With you status as the International Man of Mystery, my number one ranking could become a moot point. I hope we can hook up on St. Patrick's Day this year, if not before it.......


Themanwiththegoldendart

 

[Gaffa]

Shamers...

...as always I talk a good game. Sadly its been so long since stepped up to the 'ockie I fear that I would soon be cursing another miss at double 1. You are right though...its it about time we got out for a pint.

Thecrafty****.

 

[Captain Shamrock]

Tonight......

8:15 at the Buc and Ear for any TTPers who are interested. It is in the back part of the pub and there are 3 tv's if anyone wants to watch the hockey game/soccer game(?), in between darts of course.


Executioner

 

[Home Brew]

jan.30

Thru rain or snpw,thru sleet or hail,you can always count on the U.S.mail! LIKEWISE YOU CAN COUNT ON sIDEWINDER being at the Buck tonight ; especially if the TotalPackageis there and fair game for those of us who are on winning streaks' Hurricane is coming along with his newly purchased fflights. For those not attending channel 83 has darts at 9pm.Tomorrow more darts channel 84 at 4pm.

 

[Captain Shamrock]

Entertaining night despite the many no-shows

It was an action packed night filled with controversy. The wire on the south board cost the Executioner one match against Double In and the pure shitty condition of the north board cost me 5 years less of my 20/20 vision. This is where Total Package Naidu 'beat' me. The score is under investigation right now.

Anyway, it was nice to finally meet Double In. He certainly has a promising career on the circuit, as he beat the Executioner and Hurricane once, but also lost to Sidewinder twice and the Total Package twice. Hurricane showed up late, so he only played 4 matches, losing the first two against Double In and the Executioner. He gained some respect back by beating both players the next time......

Please correct me if I am wrong, but I think the final win/loss totals went something like this:

The Executioner 7 - 3

Sidewinder 5 - 4

Double In 3 - 5

Total Package 3 - 4 (again, one match is under investigation)

Hurricane Mulgrew 2 - 2 ( soon to be out of the rankings all together due his anonymity on TTP.....


The Total Package threw several TWO's along the way and Double In was cursed with the same wire that cost the Executioner victory against him, ironically.....


Executioner

 

[Home Brew]

simple arithmatic(sp.(

must be an error. your total results add up to 20 wins and 18 losses! 5 wins 4 losses correct for sidewinder. probable correction total package 2 wins 5 losses. weekly rankings require this error to be confirmed/corrected.

 

[knvb]

This ain't no In law league!

Captain~

Scores look right. 'Doubles in's' first night on tour went about as well as can be expected. I was hoping for 500 after a battle win over the tours #1 and a quick win over side"I can't believe I just got a treble 20 and a bull + a 18 for 128" winder...... . Sidewinder! Let me tell you the name is there for a reason!

The total package had my number all evening. His big advantage was getting me on his tunnel of darkness board. The guy must be part cat. The first game was a close one with 'Double' running on pure adrenalin and only losing because he can't hit a double 7 to save his life, but the second was allot quicker. The Fijian flash had downed his pint put on his jacket and wrapped up his other two darts before his throw even hit the damn board. BTW, See ya TP....

As for the Hurricane well he certainly lives up to his name. We all know I'm not the smartest lad that ever grace the D.C.S , but fcuk me I'm still subtracting my score from my total and hurricane has thrown his 3 downed a pint ordered another and was pushing me out of the way. Thanks for the ear pierce BTW. Mental note bring a calculator when playing the Hurricane!

Patience is a virtue my friend!

The 'Executioner' Well he was what I expected from a #1. He had it all, He could put up the points and he had the finish of a champ. I look forward to a couple of rematches for sure. After all my record vs the top two is 500. Maybe that means I play to my competition level.

Yours in dart traction, KNVB/'Double in'

 

[Home Brew]

Thursday non event.

What is up with Jimmy Ball and Chain,Hurricane;All talk and no action Mulgrew? At 6.55 p.m.tonight he phones SIDEWINDER To advise he is at Mr. O"Hares and so s/w. hurries there with darts in hand. Once there ,with a pint of Kilkenny in hand s/w says "lets play" to wich b. and c. replies ' o,my darts are in the car and it`s parked a long way away,and I am tired and I have just played squash!'' What a whiner!How can you maintain your ranking with excuses like this?Should he be referred to discipline?

 

[Captain Shamrock]

Don't worry....

When the rankings come out on Sunday, Ball and Chain will be deleted, unless he signs up on TTP. This is just another flatulent attempt by Hurricane to 'pick and choose who and when he wants to play'............I'd be lying if I said I wasn't disappointed.

On a side note, the Total Package could be disciplined for his abrupt departure last night. Double In and Sidewinder were baffled when they turned around to say good-bye and he was gone. He barely said anything thing to me, again creating suspicion about the result of our last match. I'm sure a person can only live with a tainted conscience for so long.......


Off to mark a Math test.......

 

[knvb]

The plot thickens

After reading your post it would seem I to may have been taken in by the Total Package con. He kept score in both our matches and as we all know he was the only one with good enough eye sight to see not only the dart board but the score table.

I was cruising along and had myself down to a simple treble 13 / double 16 combo out to have my first back to back win when TP throws 2 and say's without an ounce of expression "good game." No hands up, no Yeeeees!, no there ya go who's your daddy boo-yaa! Nothing! And before I could look to verify the score had come off and sidewinder was quickly ushered in for his re-match.

Now, Im not one to start rumours being a green rookie and all , but I think with my testimony and Captains dodgy defeat TP should at the very least be under some sort of review.

I will begin my training tomorrow with a renewed focus. I'm still going to try and live up to my earlier statement of moving up 5 to 6 spots by the end of February. With the elimination of Ball and Chain and the antics of TP I may be there sooner that expected..

 

[Home Brew]

gamesmanship at it`worst!

Sidewinder was suckered by the hurricane t -night. 8 games were played under extraordinary conditions at the Buck and Ear.Distractions included a live loud rock /roll band,adjoining pool games with sidewinder getting 2 pool cues up the arse [lucky?],a dart playing chick ,a waitresses tray of drinks spilled by the hurricane ,and of course the unlit south board.Sidewinder did beat Jimmy in one game with a brilliant first dart double finish,however he was soundly beaten in the other 7 games.Obviously sidewinder spent the entire day warming up at an out of townestablishment;hence the request to sidewinder to drive him tonight.none of this really matters as Hurricane will be deleted from the rankings for failing to register on t.t.p.

 

[Captain Shamrock]

You're spot on with the assessment of the Hurricane. He will be gone on Sunday.....

I wanted to go down the road tonight but the Fork and Knife didn't get home until 11:30. I figured you would have left by then.

Was the dart chick good looking at least? As for the 7 - 1 record the Hurricane racked up, it will go as a 2 - 0 win. There is no reason to ever beat someone like that. If we are going to start playing the same person 8 times a day, I am going to start challenging the kids in my class and a couple of the women teachers.

Hurricane has been out of order lately and he must be disciplined by the D.C.S. I think the Total Package is going to be pulling his annual "invisible man" act in the next little while. He has made no effort to contact anyone regarding any matches before the new rankings are released on Sunday night.......


The Executioner

 

[HURRICANE]

Originally posted by Captain Shamrock
You're spot on with the assessment of the Hurricane. He will be gone on Sunday.....

I wanted to go down the road tonight but the Fork and Knife didn't get home until 11:30. I figured you would have left by then.

Was the dart chick good looking at least? As for the 7 - 1 record the Hurricane racked up, it will go as a 2 - 0 win. There is no reason to ever beat someone like that. If we are going to start playing the same person 8 times a day, I am going to start challenging the kids in my class and a couple of the women teachers.

Hurricane has been out of order lately and he must be disciplined by the D.C.S. I think the Total Package is going to be pulling his annual "invisible man" act in the next little while. He has made no effort to contact anyone regarding any matches before the new rankings are released on Sunday night.......


The Executioner

 

[HURRICANE]

Originally posted by HURRICANE

Captain's quote "If there's no reason to ever beat someone like that and if we're going to start playing the same person 8 x a day, I'll start challenging my kids and the school teachers." What my answer to that is quite simple, "If that's what it takes to beat the Hurricane, so be it." Double one, Sorry about the ear piercing, and don't forget your calculator.

 

[knvb]

That would be Double In and Welcome to TTP.

 

[Captain Shamrock]

Welcome Hurricane

It was just a matter of time before Hurricane became a member. By the way, Hurricane, matches against Augusta don't count in the rankings.

I am looking forward to thrashing you soon. I had an excellent practice session last night and will be firing on all cylinders when we meet next time.

Is anyone in to playing any matches tonight? I will be free after 8:00.

Executioner

 

[Screw You Captain]

the circuit

Hello dart players and admirers of dart players,

My one week sabbatical is now over and I should be back in action this week. It sounds like I have missed much fine action, but rest assured, I'll be back.

I'll leave you which a section of the Captain's latest math test.

Off to mark a Math test.......

1. You require 103 to finish. Should you
a. go for the treble 20
b. try for the treble 19 to get to even
c. knock a drink tray on your opponent

2. Caculate the area and circumference of the dart board. If you deserve to pass this test, you will already know the dimensions.

Bonus: Who was the first to record a nine dart finish on TV.

Cheers,
Scud

 

[Captain Shamrock]

Great stuff, Scud. You forgot the other option:

d) ask person who is playing pool to shove cue up opponent's arse


BTW, when did you see the Math test I gave them? That was pretty accurate........Also, the Lemon/Blueberry muffins were exquisite.......

Executioner

 

[Home Brew]

welcome HURRICANE

It was not until I was sitting on the can enjoying a number 2 and thinking, that I realized the extent of Hurricanes gamesmanship. This man' spent several years living in the Yukon,where for half the year you dont see the light of day! This would explain his refusal to play on the well lit south board at O`Hares on thursday and lure me to the tunnel of darkness at the Buck.last night. Only the Fijian flash and hurricane can see the fukcing numbers;the rest of us just play from memory'

 

[Captain Shamrock]

Sidewinder,

In order to avoid such problems in the future, we will have an elaborate system in place before our next gathering. The only player who gets to choose the board will be the number ranked player. He would be the equivalent of the St. Louis Rams or Detroit Red Wings, getting home advantage all the way through the playoffs. After this, the only fair way to decide which board to use, would be a closest to the bull shot. The player who is closest gets to choose the board. Now, you may argue over the board to be used for the 'diddle for middle', in which case you can use BOTH boards simultaneusly and bring a tape measure to check the distance if there is any discrepancy. Hopefully, it doesn't get to this point, but apparently with the egos that now poison our once simple and humble circuit, this might be the only option.


Hurricane is a wanker.


Captain