TTP Closet - Part 4 - The Doctor is in the HOUSE

Who will be Banished to the TTP Closet?


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Hands of Stone

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To be banished to the TTP Closet.

1. Dr. Phil – This guys has rode Opera’s coat tails all the way to his own show. Now I am not one to watch Opera, but when the misses has it on and Dr. Phil is on, I want to lose my lunch at how arrogant this guy is when it comes to self-help. He even has best selling self help books out; god knows who is buying this crap. I would rather have a go at Dr. Ruth than watch Dr. Phil and all his crap, I only hope he can self help himself into the TTP Closet.

2. BAD Drivers – These are the ignorant pricks on the road that pull up to a red light in the left lane, and then turn on their turn signal right when the light turns green (I hate that). Or the lady that drives in the fast lane at the same speed as the cars in the right lane (get the hell out of the way). Now I know there has been a little talk of road rage lately, and I in no why endorse violence as a way to stop bad drivers, so don’t chase a guy around in the underground in your over priced Benz, but instead cut that arsshole off into the TTP Closet.

3. Trucker Sheik – Was out for a pint at the Loose Moose and then the Roxy for a buddies B-day not long ago, and over half the guys in both places are wearing Trucker Hats, you know the ones with the mesh at the back. Now I know that Trucker Sheik is so yesterday in Hollywood, but even beyond that, why was it even a fashion statement to begin with. Who out there wants to try and look like a trucker, unless you are heading down to the dinner and trying shag Flo in the broom closet, well leave the Trucker Sheik in the TTP Closet.

4. Reality T.V. – Come on, enough already, I was done after the first Survivor and the second Temptation Island. The producers and creators of these shows have hit all time lows for ideas for reality shows. How many Fear Factor gross out shows have to be produced. If people in TV land had any creativity there would be a lot more hard hitting dramas or funny sit-coms that we could view instead of Average JOE. The reality is, Reality T.V. sucks and it should be shown as re-runs in the TTP Closet.

5. Trap Hockey – Well I have to complain about something to do with hockey in this town or I wouldn’t be a Nucks fan, and since the Nucks are first over all, I will complain about the game itself. The new systems of Trap Hockey that coaches are using in the NHL are killing the game, which was so great to watch back in the 80’s. I wonder if the Mighty Oilers of the 80’s would have won as many Cups as they did, if they had to get passed the Wild ever year in the first or second round. When you hear the superstars of the league go on about what this system has done to the game, then you know it has to go. I give Trap Hockey a game misconduct penalty and send it to the TTP Closet for good.

That was a lot of pressure Smallsy, but I enjoyed it, now for the pressure of a game vs. Sap. on Friday Night.

hos
 

5bigtoes

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3. Trucker Sheik

would have to agree with HOS, simply one of the dumbest looks going Hollywood or not!
 

Buckfast

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5bigtoes said:
3. Trucker Sheik

would have to agree with HOS, simply one of the dumbest looks going Hollywood or not!
C'mon tae fcuk. What the Christ is Trucker Chic? Possibly an Oil Baron in Dubai.
 

Hands of Stone

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It is a stupid play on words, I was hoping no one would act like a Chick about it, I thought Political Correctness was in the Closet allready.

hos
 

Dapotayto

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I don't particularly like Opera a hell of a lot. I never know what they are saying except when the fat lady sings I know it is over. That Oprah chick that hangs out with Dr. Phil is overrated too.
 

SC

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Who's next?

I'd like a go at this. Well done HOS, but I think you've stated the obvious :) I still believe there are a few things missing in the closet.

+SC
Unfort my view would be with an Asian twist :rolleyes:
 

steve1234

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I watched the Dr on Letterman recently,the look on Dave's face as phil tryed to ttp, priceless.
Bad drivers, ignore them, why waste your time with an idiot. Definately do not chase them through parkades.
Trucker gear. Even Dax has passed on that.
Really stuck watching, What not to wear, and Faking it. And the best of the lot, the reality farce, The Office.
 

Keeper

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1. Dr. Phil – Can't really go with you on this one, primarily due to the fact that I don't pay for cable. Since I don't see him, he doesn't bother me.

2. BAD Drivers – In general, I try to ignore them, but since you mentioned my one real driving pet peeve -- namely, people that think highways have "Fast Lanes" and "Slow Lanes" instead of understanding the concept of "Passing Lanes" -- I'll stick it in.

3. Trucker Sheik – One word: WTF?

4. Reality T.V. – See #1.

5. Trap Hockey - Since the Canucks usually have trouble combatting it, yes. It goes in too.
 

Fastshow

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Re: TTP Closet - Part 4 - The Doctor is in the CLOSET

Well, well, and well.

Dr. Phil: Haven't a clue who this is. I do have a vague knowledge of Oprah, the gelatinous globule who clutters up North American television with her 'feel good' tales of incomprehensibly puerile toss. Anyone who sermonises about self-help can get to fcuk on the first direct fcuk-flight. Is there any other country in the world who produces those who plead the gospel of self-help other than the USofA? Why are there no self-help disillusionists from Andorra? If ever there were a question of doctor heal thyself it is thus. Look, I've talked myself into it. Though I don't know who he is, if he's American and on the telly that's good enough for me.

Bad drivers: since I drive on the other side of the road from you (I would hope), your example of left-turning doesn't affect me. If you'd nominated driving in Vancouver I'd have led the parade to the TTP closet. Driving in Vancouver, if you've ever driven anywhere else, is a huge kick in the boys. The speed limit is archaic, there are traffic lights every five feet and when traffic lights seem like overkill the idiot city planners throw in some four-way-stops for a giggle. It would be a poor idea to keep traffic moving wouldn't it? Driving in Vancouver is awful and if anyone has the urge to go at the breakneck speed of, day, 60 miles an hour, there's inevitably a mustachio'ed cnut with a speed camera waiting to nick you. And then there's the police. There are bad drivers and then there is driving in Vancouver. Full-stop. Which is how you spend most of your time in the car there. No vote.

Trucker sheik: I don't know what this is. I take it you mean trucker chic but, again, I'm still no further to understanding just what it is you're rabbitting on about. You went for a pint at the Loose Moose, however. I went there last summer with Jinky and the dj's a cnut with no sense of irony, table service is for wankers, waitresses can all queue up to suck my pitifully small dick, and having to tip for anything is rubbish. Anyone who looks to Hollywood for fashion advice is beyond reprehension anyway. I will vote for this because I hate the Loose Moose and Hollywood.

Reality T.V.: The latest example of this phenomenon (I blame, for once, the Dutch as they invented Big Brother. Well, they didn't really, Big Brother is Orwellian but the second class Germans found it necessary to suggest people might enjoy sitting in their homes as they watch other people sit in theirs, surely one of modern life's best pisstakes) where I live (Antwerp) is called Shattered. The premise of this groundbreaking piece of celluloidal excrement is televising people deprived of sleep, the winner being the person who can stay awake the longest. And that prize is just for the televisual audience. £100,000 prize and all. Shite. Steve1234 called it when he said, however, that without such shite, the genius that is Ricky Gervais's The Office would not exist. And the only thing in the world funnier than watching The Office would be watching The Office in a room full of Americans and Germans and looking on as they SImply Did Not Get It. So no, I cannot vote for reality t.v.

Trap Hockey: As someone who is a staunch advocate of replacing the NHL rinks with European-sized rinks in order to be able to enjoy a faster and more skilled game, I'm in favour of banishing trap hockey to the TTP closet. Send Jacques Lemaire with it as he is, put simply, the spawn of Satan. Fcuk the red line too. Hockey in the 1980's was so very different, however, on many levels. The game has never been the same since Gary Bettman got his impressive saphardic nose involved and the world changed forever when the Smythe, Norris, Adams, and Patrick Divisions became the current faceless, characterless, undignified, washed-out insults to the great Canadian game. I will vote for this and, in a fit of pointless pique, will hit the vote button next to it with unnecessary force.
 

lita

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reality tv has got my vote. do we really want to watch these people make complete asses of themselves and lower and degrade themselves for a chance at money, or even worse just to be an idiot on tv. What have we become. reality tv is for people with no lives and feel the need to watch other peoples, get grip go outside or at least turn the channel.
 

bravedart

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They can all go in the closet but trucker chic most of all, that is a trend brought on by JT Justin Timberlake from his videos about a year ago!

I saw it then and started to worry and now my fears have come to light.

I have the same kind of feeling about the end of the world too! I wonder if these will come about like my last fear?
 

Guinness

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Well done HOS, not bad for a siv... ;)

DR. Phil:
I've honestly never seen him before although I've heard of his arogant pompous ass... No vote

Bad drivers:
Richmond is the worst community in the lower mainland mainly due to the fact a certain little shite box (Captain's civic with smelly balls) roams all over the shop... That and the parallel parking athletes who take an eternity to hang a left on a green turn signal!!! :mad: Slam the closet door shut...

Trucker Shiek:
I've heard of the Iron Shiek, but his boots were never really fashonable anyway... As for JT and Hollywood embracing garb such as mesh hats and the like, does this mean it was in at some point, is just hitting Van City after crosing the Atlantic :rolleyes: or a waste of time if your an over weight pig without a fcuking sence of style and no hott bird would even glance in your direction if you wore your patten high school tight rolled jeans complete with your hyper colour T-shirt??? sorry HOS, no clue to where you were heading with this one...
BTW, I own a few mesh hats and have rocked them many Kamloops gong shows!!!
Reality T.V.:
I don't have a favourite and have never watched a full episode of Survivor (I'd rather watch KNVB & Dude laugh their arses off on the Balcony of Muppet Show)... However, Tempatation Island (I didn't realize they had a second season) had a few things to look at on a lame Wednesday night... no clear vote here either...

Trap Hockey:
I don't want to get started on this subject or I'll be at it for hours... Lets just chuck it into the deepest darkest closet known to man...


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Little Christopher has occasionally been a bundle of joy to work with over the past schoolastic year... If only he spent more time day dreaming and drooling while in the sand box like the other children, rather than pull the girls hair and throw alphabetical blocks at the black board I'd conclude he'd have a half chance at bagging my groceries in 10 years............... Ms. Daisy
 

Dude

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Nice set of choices, Hos.

1. Dr. Phil. Saw him on TV once when I was in California for work, and actually had a laugh at the way he took the piss out of some Mom who came to him because she’s upset that her 17 year old son is draining their bank account: the kid has a huge room w/ ensuite, plasma TV, skis, walk in closet full of the best surf clothes, jet ski (that wasn’t in the room, but in the garage), and was now on his fourth- yes, fourth, SUV because he’d crashed the previous 3. She wanted Dr. Phil to talk to her son about responsibility; instead he spent 30 minutes exposing how stupid her and her husband were. That said, had you mentioned either that hypocritical bitch Dr. Laura, or that mega cnut Martha Stewart, you’d have my vote.

2. Bad drivers: definitely, but have to agree with Fasty’s moan about driving in Vancouver…a diabolical pain in the ass. The bad drivers here just make it all the more terrible.

3. Trucker Chic: a gay trend started by Ashley Kutcher. How did he bag Demi Moore, anyhow? Stupid trend, and it gets my vote.

4. Reality TV: I agree with the fact that most of these are like watching bad train wrecks, and they're getting worse. Above all, I hate American Idol. Unfortunately, I’m a Survivor addict, and if I throw reality TV in the closet, I lose my Survivor fix. Long live Rudy.

5. Trap Hockey: I would, but it may be instrumental in helping the ‘Nucks win the Cup one day…so I regrettably keep it out of the closet.
 

SC

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Trucker sheik

If someone has the time, you might want to do a search for Paris Hilton, looking her best in a fricken Trucker style hat :confused:

Here's a dumbass putting on a great Trucker Sheik impersonation:rolleyes:
 
I

iandmcintyre

Do I dare post on this thread? Oh, what the hell! It's been a few days since I've been insulted online.

Dr Phil: seen him on TV, unfortunately... Where does he get his guests? Why do these people appear with him on TV? Are they hoping to get movie contracts or jobs on reality TV?

Reality TV: One of these days they're going to get forced into admitting that their shows are scripted just like WWE Wrestling. Don't waste my time watching them.

Bad Drivers: Vancouver BC has the worst drivers in Canada. And, "no, I'm not one of them". My previous act of parking lot chasing was a harmless act to scare a bad driver. Not to mention how dishonest people are when it comes to hit and runs. My cars have been hit and run about 10 times over the past 7 years - people run from the scene of the accident without leaving a note.

Trucker Chic: No opinion.

Trap Hockey: Can be bothered even watching NHL hockey. Too many fights, would rather watch a boxing match.
 

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