Youtube Finds Take II

[trece verde]

Fight scenes: 10 out of 10.
Plot: meh...

 

[Regs]

Fight scenes: 10 out of 10.
Plot: meh...

What about the kickboxing flick?

 

[cascadesoccer]

 

[freddy]

I showed that to my wife. She liked it and asks, "what's that on"? I say TTP and she responds, "I thought that was only soccer and porn?"

 

[Regs]

TTP - it's a lifestyle

 

[cascadesoccer]

I showed that to my wife. She liked it and asks, "what's that on"? I say TTP and she responds, "I thought that was only soccer and porn?"

Mrs Freddy, shouldn't know about that part of TTP, unless she's a member. No sharing accounts now. Tisk Tisk

 

[Regs]

LOL

 

[freddy]

So, here's a long story - they come out once in a while. I used to work for a company where I was the sales guy for the West and my buddy was the East. A classical Jewish guy, with two kids and a wife (killer sales guy, driven, but demented - not sure all Jewish guys are demented). This guy was the biggest nastiest porn dude I have ever crossed paths with. However, my brother, way back in the day sent me the nastiest 6 seconds of porn I have ever seen, titled "Beerpoop". It was a dude that looked like the gimp from Pulp Fiction, all dressed up in dark leather lying down on his back with a naked woman on top of him who proceeds to take a crap on his chest, and then a secondary splatter hits a juicy one right in his face. This was probably 1999, and very early in the world of Internet porn. I sent this onto Rob and he then revered me as the God of Porn and would send me the most demented stuff you could imagine. I had to tell him to stop, eventually as this was just totally screwed up sh!t

So, this is where the story gets sad and effed up. 8 years later, Rob ends up getting a stage 4 glioblastoma brain tumor (sort of like Gord Downie, but uglier). There is no chance of survival for this. So, I get on a plane to visit my friend in Florida. I had met his wife before, but not his kids. I get there and I am in their home office with the two of them helping them through the ugly task of navigating insurance nightmares. Rob had a Volcano vaporizer (pot smoking device) sitting there on the counter which I had never seen. He explains his son bought it for him, but his wife is too nervous to let him use it because she doesn't know what it would do to a brain tumor. Just then, his 18 year old daughter comes in. They say, "Alison, this is Freddy". She gives me a heavy glare, says nothing. Then looks at the Volcano and says, "who's vaporizer"? Rob and Kathy both point immediately at me. So, I absorb it and try to explain that Canada is much more liberal about it. After dinner, I comment to Rob about what a cold stare I got from his darling daughter. So, it turns out, over the years as we have been trading porn, Rob occasionally got caught looking at porn and then blamed it on me, sure that his kids would never meet me. A safe fall guy. But, here I am - Porn-Freddy. And trust me, out of the two of us, Rob is definitely the Porn King.

The night got weirder, as after dinner the son comes home, goes into his room only to find that his blunt (another word at that time I didn't know what it meant) had been stolen. He blames his sister, and then the two of them lose it in a no holds barred fight over the stolen doob. Anyways, Mrs Freddy is aware that I am somewhat demented and occasionally sees me in the Premium section of TTP and sees some legendary posts that occur in that section. Not a tsk tsk, just what happens.

 

[cascadesoccer]

You seriously need a memoir. I'll take 2.

 

[freddy]

Oh yeah - the chick had shaken up a beer up into her ass first, and then started blasting out beer foam, before the first turd lands on the chest, thus the name, beerpoop. Sorry for leaving that detail out. The second turd in the face was fully unexpected.

 

[djones]

Jumping out of a plane 7 km above without a parachute...into a fishing net!



Apparently, this was the backup jumper for the Felix Baumgartner jump from the stratosphere in 2012

 

[freddy]

That was completely insane!

 

[utah]

Amazzzing

 

[cascadesoccer]

 

[cascadesoccer]

 

[Rangerforever]

Awesome

 

[djones]

I love documentaries...

Ice Guardians debuts at TIFF

 

[cascadesoccer]

 

[freddy]

So, how does this oversized porker do when he is the smallest kid on the field? I played rugby through high school and was always one of the smallest on the field. I had to tackle the likes of Taso and Trazelini (two memorable giants). Taso was more than twice as heavy as me and a force to be reckoned with - their secret penalty play when they were inside 15 was simply called, "Taso". They wold tap the ball and give it to him to run over our two props like bowling pins and score a tri. I always fantasized about how cool it would be had I been my proportions and skills, but 50% bigger than my opponents. I would have decimated them. I subsequently had the same thoughts when playing the firemen. I would have kicked the crap out of Mary and the rest of those goons, although I actually like them as people.

Anyways, this superstar kid unfortunately is going to be featured on America's Biggest Loser in a few years.

 

[Rangerforever]

Regardless I still laughed my tits off.
He was swatting at those kids like they were flies lol.

But to appease Freddy's ego, yes, he should be playing up an age group, or four.