TTP Bookie: Euro 2004 Final Portugal v Greece

[knvb]

What a disgraceful, lame and shameful cry for help. Have you no dignity, man? Ballbaby, it is I who guaranteed a Greek win by betting on the pork chops. Not only that but I need 20, 000 tokens to help feed my family, pay for surgery to treat a rare medical disorder and to fund a trip to Disneyland for my dying, invisible friend. Can you help a brother? Peace be with you my fellow TTPer.

That's nothing more than an obvious attempt to destroy my bladder. Don't listen to him Ballbaby. He has no respect for the Excessively-haired disordered like I do. It's so simple to see he's made that entire thing up... No one would ever want to be his friend, not even an invisible one. He’s been out to get my bladder ever since it dated his sister and left her on the side of the road that time before last. She knew the rules and had read the bumper sticker knowing full well it was ass, grass or gas. No one rides for free.

I know you’ll make the right decision with your generosity. And I promises right here and now when I get back on my feet I’ll donate my posting tokens to Laser Hair removal surgery clinics around the world to reduce those terrible waiting lists.

Solidarity forever my brother.

 

[Dapotayto]

Ugh, what a disgusting turn of events. And I'm not talking about the constant references to excess body hair. It is absolutely appalling the way you shameslessly grovel for chits. When you get back on your feet you'll donate some tokens? Did you mean to say once you've finished your business on your knees and back on your feet? Ballbaby, listen to me. I've also got a friend who is stuck here in Vancouver and needs some tokens to get home. He's lonely, homesick and his health is deteriorating badly. Only you can help. I've enclosed a picture of him so you can see the poor lad for yourself.

 

[knvb]

I find it absolutely reprehensible that you would take a picture of your bell end after you've drawn eyes on it and masquerade it around as your lonesome mate for tokens. I doubt very much that he's lonely as well. I bet he gets all the attention that he needs.... Doesn't anyone wonder why the only time you play with "your friend" is when you're in the bathroom? What will your mother say when you bring him over for dinner? Why does he only come over for 20 seconds? Questions I think you need to ask yourself before others do.

Ballbaby, the hairy can wait. Send me some tokens so I can get Dap some help.

 

[Keeper]

Has anyone actually wondered where Ballbaby is during all of this?

Recovering still?

 

[Dapotayto]

He's with Fastshow. I heard Fasty has entered a bodybuilding competition in Slovakia and he needed Ballbaby's help in painting on his fake tan while he stood in the bathtub clad in his fire engine red (Ballbaby's idea) nuthuggers. I believe the only communication devices they have there is carrier pigeon so Fastshow's pisstakes should be arriving any day now. Hopefully that fcuking pigeon delivered any pictures straight to Dude's house though. No need for that sort of thing here.

 

[Ballbaby]

I cannot believe you vultures are begging for my tokens. Have you no pride? On top of that you make references to an abnormal inventory of hair follicules on my body! I am not overly hairy. In fact, most Greeks are not hairy. I am one Greek who does have a hairy chest, ah, but what a chest it is! Listen! Can you hear it? The thunder, the sound of a tornado. That is the sound of one of Alexander the Great's decendants beating his chest causing a jingle jangle of tokens to fall from his pockets. These tokens will remain where they belong, in the confines of a proud hairy warrior with a 24 hour five o' clock shadow.

Here is what I will offer you. I will squeeze some of my testosterone from one of my appendages into your morning protein drink. I have plenty to spare. You may grow some hair and also some testicles. Now quit groveling for my tokens you Canadian gypsies and listen to the thunder once again.




I'mgonnamilkthiswhileIcan

 

[knvb]

sick

If anyone wants to lodge a complaint for the awful mental imagery of a hairy Greek squeezing an appendage for its juice, please forward them to Dap. I had everything under control until he got greedy and tried to one up my token whoring attempts. Fcuk sakes, now I’ll forever see Ballbaby pounding the shag carpet on his chest with one hand and cupping a nut with the other.

I'm sure the Gods would be proud.

 

[Dapotayto]

Quality post Zorba, but while I appreciate the offer of your pure Greek testosterone I must respectfully decline. I could certainly use a few more inches of height but don't really have any burning ambition to have to shave five times a day. Mach 3 razors are extemely pricey nowadays and I have gotten too old to steal them from Safeway. What would I say to my Dad, the greatest living train-robber of all time? "But Dad, they have three stainless steel blades and a pivoting head for an ultra close and smooth shave"? I'd be a laughing stock at the old folks home. Not only that but I'd be drummed out of my Canadian gypsy clan for having more hair than the dancing bears we are holding captive in KNVB's backyard.

I could use some tokens, though, to aid me in my daily pursuits. Perhaps Champlain's Keeper could help. CK, I am a 100%, fully certified chicken hawk and I reckon on getting me a chicken. Only problem is, I don't really know what a chicken looks like. I thought I found one but then my friend's dog tells me he's a shnook not a chicken. Fcuking hell. Then Fastshow tells me what I really want is a pheasant but Fasty's gone now and I don't know what to do. He did offer to sell me some vanishing cream (so I could sneak up on chickens invisible-like) before he left, but the price is 23, 000 tokens. What do you say big boy?

 

[termatofylakas]

There you go Dap. I was only able to spare 2000 for you but enjoy them. This is what you get for pushing around the Justice team last night and not ordering a "salad". I do expect this back once you start winning or you can buy me a Heineken next time I see you guys.

P.S. Remind me never to eat at that place again.

 

[knvb]

WTF??? How's that work?

I should expect mine will be along shortly then eh? Champlain's? Dap, will most certainly buy you two Heineken's next time he sees you. It's the least he could do considering the extreme magnitude of your generosity towards me. That'a lad.

PS. Don't eat at that place again.

 

[Dapotayto]

Ah, gracias, CK. After I fritter all my tokens away gambling on the Nations Cup I will endeavour to pay you back as quickly as possible. There will probably be flying cars before then but I appreciate your patience.

KNVB, isn't it obvious what you have to do to garner tokens in such a manner? Maybe not. Well, it's like this. Write a story involving dancing bears, chicken hawks, train robbers and pheasants and you never know what'll happen. Rememember though, you must do it at work and upon finishing you have to clap with one hand three times then punch yourself in the nose in a clockwise direction while running around the office yelling, "I'm a goof, I'm a goof". Quite simple, really.

 

[Dapotayto]

By the way, O'Beaker, I can't read that fcuking sign in the picture you posted. What, is it in fcuking Gaelic you Irish bastard?

 

[knvb]

Why lie? It's for beer...

I think when you break it right down, Dap, it’s as simple as your basic house hold manners. You need to be courteous in you endeavour to whore one out of his well earn tokens. You of course also need to aggressive in you pursuits, while definitely remembering to remain humble. The being humble bit is key in all this, but to what level depends on the whoree. Be warned my friend to much may spew of arrogance, unless of course you’re a direct descendant of Alexander the Great and can squeeze the very life blood of male existence from your right nut night like a Jack Handy Super Juicer. (Only 3 easy payments of $19.95) Then there is the way of writing completely wild and delusional, some I’m sure are very drug related, tales of affluence, sodomy, ebony and that bitch Ivory… And chicken Hawks. How could I have forgotten about the fcuking chicken hawks?

 

[Dapotayto]

Since when did humility ever play a role in whoring tokens? This is Takethepiss.com not Becomeabuddhist.org. Go chant your mantras somewhere else, you humble Irish prick.

 

[Ballbaby]

Isn't this refreshing for a change? It shows why the Greek team was so successful. No selfishness, especially from their leader.






Zagorakis gives AEK 'goodbye gift' at departure


Zagorakis, MVP of Euro2004



ATHENS, July 13 (SW) - Thodoris Zagorakis, the MVP of Euro 2004, has parted ways with AEK. This was officially announced on Tuesday. The captain of European champions Greece, has left after spending the last four years at the club, aiming for a transfer abroad.

Zagorakis was thanked by AEK for his way of saying "goodbye", as the 33 year old midfielder released the club from paying 50 percent of what they owned him, and he will collect the remaining 300,000 Euros over the next three years.

For this act AEK have released an official announcement, thanking Zagorakis for everything he has given the team in the past and for his decision to leave as a friend.

"On the 10th July of 2000, Thodoris Zagorakis wore the AEK shirt for the first time. From that very first day Zagorakis honoured the team and the fans with his presence. At these hard times that AEK have been through, Thodoris Zagorakis showed that he cares for the team," the statement said.

After his magnificent performances during Euro 2004, Zagorakis is targeted by many European clubs, although he refuses to reveal the name of the team where he will choose to continue his career.

Many sources claim that one is Bologna of Serie A, whereas names such as Tottenham, Everton, Bolton and Atletico Madrid have been mentioned as well, according to his manager Kimon Kokoroyannis.

Zagorakis began his career at Kavala in the second division, in the season 1988-1989. He stayed there until the first half of the season 1992-1993 and then he was transferred to PAOK Thessalonikis, playing his first games in the first division.

After almost six years in the city, he earned himself a transfer to the English Premier League, where he played for Leicester. In the year 2000 Zagorakis returned at home soil, this time for AEK.

Meanwhile, AEK had a great relief on Tuesday, as it was announced that no team with debts, such as AEK, would be relegated this year and the government promised to offer a plan in order to settle the debts.

"Enosis" will also be given the stadium OAKA for home games next year, as the old "Nikos Goumas" stadium was demolished, in order to be replaced by a new, luxurious stadium.

AEK are currently trying to find a new coach and according to most sources that will be Fernando Santos, who has been in that position in the past and was popular among the fans.
Santos, ex-manager of Sporting Lissabon, seems to be one step away from returning, and he is expected to be announced at the end of the week.