Joke of the Day

[Argyle]

A RUSSIAN AND A NEWFOUNDLAND WRESTLER WERE SET
TO SQUARE OFF FOR THE OLYMPIC GOLD MEDAL.

BEFORE THE FINAL MATCH, THE NEWFIE WRESTLER'S
TRAINER CAME TO HIM AND SAID, "NOW, DON'T FORGET ALL
THE RESEARCH WE'VE DONE ON THIS RUSSIAN. HE'S NEVER
LOST A MATCH BECAUSE OF THIS 'PRETZEL' HOLD HE HAS.
WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT LET HIM GET YOU IN THAT HOLD!
IF HE DOES, YOU'RE FINISHED"; THE NEWFIE NODDED IN
ACKNOWLEDGEMENT.

AS THE MATCH STARTED, THE NEWFIE AND THE RUSSIAN
CIRCLED EACH OTHER SEVERAL TIMES, LOOKING FOR AN
OPENING.

ALL OF A SUDDEN, THE RUSSIAN LUNGED FORWARD,
GRABBING THE NEWFIE AND WRAPPING HIM UP IN THE
DREADED PRETZEL HOLD. A SIGH OF DISAPPOINTMENT
AROSE FROM THE CROWD AND THE TRAINER BURIED
HIS FACE IN HIS HANDS, FOR HE KNEW ALL WAS LOST.
HE COULDN'T WATCH THE INEVITABLE HAPPEN.

SUDDENLY, THERE WAS A SCREAM, THEN A CHEER FROM
THE CROWD AND THE TRAINER RAISED HIS EYES JUST IN
TIME TO WATCH THE RUSSIAN GO FLYING UP IN THE AIR. HIS
BACK HIT THE MAT WITH A THUD AND THE NEWFOUNDLANDER
>>> >>> >> COLLAPSED ON TOP OF HIM MAKING THE PIN AND WINNING THE
>>> >>> >> MATCH.
>>> >>> >>
THE TRAINER WAS ASTOUNDED. WHEN HE FINALLY GOT
HIS WRESTLER ALONE, HE ASKED, "HOW DID YOU EVER GET
OUT OF THAT HOLD? NO ONE HAS EVER DONE IT BEFORE!"

THE WRESTLER ANSWERED "WELL, I WAS READY TO GIVE
UP WHEN HE GOT ME IN THAT HOLD BUT AT THE LAST MOMENT,
I OPENED MY EYES AND SAW THIS PAIR OF TESTICLES RIGHT
IN FRONT OF MY FACE. I HAD NOTHING TO LOSE SO WITH MY
LAST OUNCE OF STRENGTH I STRETCHED OUT MY NECK AND
BIT THOSE BABIES JUST AS HARD AS I COULD."
SO THE TRAINER EXCLAIMED, "THAT'S WHAT FINISHED
HIM OFF!"

"NOT REALLY. YOU'D BE AMAZED HOW STRONG YOU GET
WHEN YOU BITE YOUR OWN NUTS."

 

[Argyle]

Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A small tree begins to grow between them, and the beech says to the birch,
"Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch?"

The birch says he cannot tell.

Just then a woodpecker lands on the sapling.


The birch says, "Woodpecker, you are a tree expert. Can you tell if that is a son of a beech or a son of a birch?"

The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree. replies, "It
is neither a son of a beech nor a son of a birch. It is, however, the best piece of ash I have ever put my pecker in."

 

[Regs]

Team Canada.

 

[Argyle]

Team Canada.

You could not resist could you!!!

How true it is!!!

 

[BlazeArmy]

What's worse than a male chauvinist??


A woman who doesn't listen.