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International and Local Darts Championships

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Captain Shamrock

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There were a few unsanctioned matches today at Rose and Crown in Tsawwassen. The Executioner, Cheese Puff, and a new Aussie named Alan "Please don't call me" Darling. The results were:

The Executioner 2
Please Don't Call Me 0

Please Don't Call Me 1
Cheese Puff 1

The Executioner 4
Cheese Puff 0

The best thing about the matches though was the cracker blonde waitress who was wearing black patent leather pants.
 

MARCOPOLO

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Captain,

Is Tsaw. a sanctioned area under the DCS, or is under a separate title. If this were the case, would there have to be a tournament set up to unify the two titles?

After tonight, I'll be back at my original ranking of #2 if not #1. I've already begun to start the mental preparation...

Marco
 

Captain Shamrock

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Marco,

Your new 'arrows' didn't help your cause tonight. Make sure you check with the Executioner next time before purchasing cheapo darts. Results from tonight at the Buck and Ear in Richmond:

The Executioner 5
Total Package 2

Triple One Arnold 0
Total Package 1

Triple One Arnold 0
The Executioner 1

Here are the new DCS rankings as of 1:15 am on January 11, 2002:

1) Stephen "The Executioner" Burns
2) Vince "Total Package" Naidu
3) Jimmy "BallandChain" Mulgrew
4) Brian "Cheese Puff" Sweeney
5) Dave "Buffalo" Arnold
6) Tim "Triple One" Arnold
7) Doug "Darts of Tin" Wooten
8) Drew "Double One" Arnold
9) Tomas "The Skyscraper"
10) Dave "Double In" Hleucka


Captain
 

SC

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early night?

Originally posted by Captain Shamrock


The best thing about the matches though was the cracker blonde waitress who was wearing black patent leather pants.

And you still managed to make it home THAT early? WTF:confused:

+SCisconfusedthattheCaptainisinvadingALLthedecentpubsinrichmond:rolleyes:
 

Screw You Captain

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a word from Cheese puff daddy

The best thing about the matches though was the cracker blonde waitress who was wearing black patent leather pants.

And you still managed to make it home THAT early? WTF

What he didn't mention was that we got stuck with the hundred year old waitress. I did see her eyeing the Captain, although she was a bit turned off when he lept on to the pool table screaming "I am the Executioner!" and waving his darts around madly.

~sycwillbebackforarematchregardlessofwhateverlameexcuseslikefootfoulsofCanadiancitizenshiporpoorlighting
 

SC

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I knew the Captain was stretching it..

Originally posted by Screw You Captain


What he didn't mention was that we got stuck with the hundred year old waitress. I did see her eyeing the Captain, although she was a bit turned off when he lept on to the pool table screaming "I am the Executioner!" and waving his darts around madly.


There is always another side to the story, eh Screw U? "The plot thickens!"
+SCwantstoknowwhenthebakeoffis:confused:
 

Captain Shamrock

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Embassy World Darts

The final of the Embassy World Darts tourney wraps up tomorrow with #4 seed, Mervyn King, going up against 18th ranked Australian, Tony David. I fancy King to win. I am not sure how this will come out but here are the results from the tourney..



Round 1
best of five sets
Round 2
best of five sets
Quarter-finals
best of nine sets
Semi-finals
best of nine sets
Final
best of 11 sets

O'Shea 2 (28.64)
Monk 3 (29.05)

Monk 3 (31.41)
Walton 2 (31.59)

Walton 3 (28.99)
Fordham 0 (28.78)

Monk 5 (31.29)
Mardle 4 (31.08)

Nagy 3 (28.08)
Anderson 0 (27.23)


Nagy 1 (29.50)
Mardle 3 (30.64)

Mardle 3 (32.37)
Rich'dson 0 (27.96)

Monk 1 (29.51)
King 5 (32.25)

Welge 1 (24.51)
Clarys 3 (27.29)

Clarys 0 (31.35)
Barnev'ld 3 (33.78)

Barnev'ld 3 (33.61)
George 1 (30.17)

Barnev'ld 3 (33.86)
King 5 (33.82)

Suljovic 3 (29.05)
der Voort 2 (29.01)

Suljovic 1 (28.61)
King 3 (31.59)

King 3 (27.92)
Stewart 1 (26.07)

King 0 (00.00)
David 0 (00.00)

Korhonen 1 (27.57)
Coote 3 (29.70)

Coote 1 (30.80)
Adams 3 (31.53)

Adams 3 (28.44)
Johnstone 0 (26.57)

Adams 5 (33.76)
Jones 1 (30.97)

Eccles 2 (29.17)
Jones 3 (28.84)

Jones 3 (30.02)
Hankey 2 (29.66)

Hankey 3 (29.82)
Komula 2 (29.40)

Adams 4 (32.86)
David 5 (33.03)

Stompe 3 (31.15)
Veitch 0 (27.50)

Stompe 1 (30.48)
Taylor 3 (31.43)

Taylor 3 (27.56)
Ferrell 0 (27.14)

Taylor 4 (30.98)
David 5 (30.97)

Davies 1 (29.08)
David 3 (30.43)

David 3 (32.08)
Pusa 1 (28.83)

Pusa 3 (29.00)
Clark 1 (29.66)

I don't like this circuit as much as the other one. These guys are no-names and I can't locate any nick-names either.


The Executioner
 

Captain Shamrock

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Sunday Night at the Buck

The Executioner 3
Total Package 0


Next up: Dave "Buffalo" Arnold in a SANCTIONED best of three match........


In international darts, the winner of the Embassy World Darts tourney was .......

TONY DAVID 6 MERVYN KING 4

England's Mervyn King had the throw as the two finallists toed the oche for the biggest match of their lives. But David got into the groove first and took the opening leg against advantage. King got the set back to 2-2 but David was not going to give it up easily and hit a 12-darter to go a set into the lead.

The Australian went one better in the first leg of set two, using just 11 darts to go ahead. King then put his Embassy experience and powerful scoring to good use and levelled the match at a set each.

King kicked off set three with 12 darts and was soon 2-1 up. He had a great opportunity to win the game but missed nine darts at the double and David levelled with his seventh shot at tops. The Aussie had shown his coolness all week and from 2-1 down he turned the set to his advantage to restore his advantage - 2-1 to David in sets.

David took charge of the match in the next set. He was the first leg, used another 11 arrows for the second and found his favourite tops to go 3-1 up.

King was lucky to hold his throw in set five but David missed his chance to capitalise. David held his own throw to level and almost claimed the third leg with an exhibition shot. Standing on 125 he hit bull 25 and then grazed the bull wire. King missed his opportunity and David struck with 17 double four. David was clearly on a roll and took the darts off King to go into the break 4-1 up in sets - two away from the coveted Embassy crown.

David came out from the interval with the throw but King got the break he needed if he was going to make an impression on the match. He was soon 2-0 ahead but the man from Queensland battled on taking the next two. He then nailed a 116 with 57 19 tops to put himself just one set away from the title.

King held his advantage to go ahead in the seventh and looked favourite to go 2-0 ahead. But, just like a boomerang, back came the Aussie to square 1-1 in legs. King held his nerve to go 2-1 in front but David put himself in a position for the match when he drilled double 16 for 2-2. David stood at 161 and found the treble 20 but the 17s shot missed and back came King to save match point go finding the double 16. David 5-2 up in sets.

David knew he only had to hold his own throw for the championship but the world's biggest stage was the most difficult place to do it.

David claimed the first leg of set eighth and held his throw through to 2-2. King though was no going to throw in the towel and broke at a vital time to give himself a life-line at 3-5 down in sets.

Darts advantae was with King once again but a timely 116 check-out from the Aussie put him ahead. King fought back to 1-1 and then hit off with 180 and 140 - enough to give him the leg. The next two legs went with the throw and, just like Martin Adams the night before, King was making a comeback. He got the match back to 4-5 in David's favour when the Aussie missed three darts at double tops for the championship but missed. The double had been good to David all week but deserted him when he needed it and King hit double eight.

Once more David had the throw and took advantage of it. King had the bit between his teeth and was fighting all the way to make it 1-1. David battled on and got ahead again and was throwing second in the next leg. He dug in as King's scoring failed him and had three more darts at his favourite double for the title. He missed double tops - hitting a 20 - missed the double ten with his first shot then slotted it home to claim the biggest darts title on earth.


The Executioner
 

Captain Shamrock

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3 double 1 finishes

Local darts at South Park Elementary Middle Board in room 125



Stephen "The Executioner" Burns 4
Brian "Scud Missile" Sweeney 0


Bad matches in terms of finishing. 3 of the finishes were on double one, with both competitors trying for the double.......

Captain
 

knvb

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Points towards ranking?

I don't know if the federation acknowledges pissing on your father-in-law on his home board for the 20th straight time but I have done it again.... Tiresome really. The key to the match was I "Doubled in" on my first throw and pops need 6 tries.

I need to move up in the rankings. I need a Sanctioned match to ground me or to tell me that I'm ready for The Executioners hard core title.

Double In 3
Father-in-law 1
 

Screw You Captain

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Renovations at the Captain's

Best of luck to the Captain on the installation of his very own dart board at La Casa del Captain. We will all probably have a little less Captain in our lives, as his 7.17 posts per day average will probably dip when his dart-playing habit starts taking 7.17 hours/day. The waitress at the Buck probably won't miss bringing him water with umbrellas, though.

Again, good luck on achieving your dream of making the senior's dart world circuit.

~sycthinkscaptainneedstogetgearedupforthebigbuffalo
 

Captain Shamrock

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Screw You,

Thanks for your warm wishes. Jimmy "Ball and Chain" Mulgrew is coming over to help set up the board properly. I can't trust myself setting it up alone. So, I will begin my rigorous(sp?) training schedule tomorrow. Play darts for an hour/quick trip to the hot tub at the Steveston Community Center to massage the fingers, wrists, and forearm/play for another hour, and so on.

Unfortunately, "The Sidewinder"(no longer Buffalo because of his unique throwing style) Arnold/Executioner match-up didn't happen tonight. The board was in use for an hour, then they challenged us to a match of cricket. Fortunately, The Sidewinder and the Executioner could put their personal animosity towards one another aside, to defeat two local putzes in a game of Cricket. After this, The Executioner and The Total Package combined to lump the same putzes. After this, they left the board and we were able to complete a couple of best of 3 sanctioned doubles' matches. The results were:

Executioner/Sidewinder 2
Total Package/El Nino 0

Executioner/El Nino 2
Total Package/Sidewinder 1

At this point in time, I would like to welcome the newest member on the circuit, Dave "El Nino" Lawrence. It was very easy to tell that this man was a natural, especially when he hit a clutch 80 to help wrap up the deciding match. Welcome aboard, El Nino.

On a side note, The Executioner reached his dream by shooting a one hundred and eiiiiiiiiiigggggggghhhhhhhhtttttttyyyyyyyy. It was very exciting for the 3 people who witnessed it.

KNVB,

You just have to stop playing the father-in-law. It is bad Karma and quite frankly, frowned upon by the DCS. We would love to welcome another player to the tour but the logistics have to be right. I am sure we will cross paths and arrows sooner, rather than later.


Captain

Captain
 

Captain Shamrock

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Do they.........

KNVB,

If they have tungsten tips, go for them. That is what many of the pro's use on the real circuit, not the Canadian Tire specials used by the Executioner, Total Package, and the Sidewinder.


I would go for a lighter arrow too.


Captain
 

coastal

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Captain

Coastal has been busy with his duties as priest, teacher and playground monitor, but found the time to be lurking during last nights match.
Total Package - perhaps with his feet. His hand/eye is shocking. He throws em up and hopes the board gets in the way.
Buffalo/Sidewinder - short jerky style obviously acquired from short jerky wanking strokes. Luckily the gusts of wind from the door being opened kept a few darts in play.
El Nino - couple of lucky arrows, but what about his TWO. Or was it two TWO'S during the match?
And this is competition for the Executioner?
Fijian boys, fat old men are fodder for your cannon?
Coastal willl be lying in wait. The Executioner is a marked man.
BTW - does Sexual Chocolate like darts? Does she like the Executioner? She probably loves the Total Package, but does he love her?

I know this doesn't belong here, but is Zenga a tribal name?

curiousinmydeviantfashion

Coastal
 

Captain Shamrock

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Competition is competition. Any time a player steps on the oche, it is all business. Sidewinder feels confident right now as he disposes of his 2 kids in underground darts; hence the challenge to the Executioner. I take no opponent lightly. Everytime I step up for a match, everyone is gunning for me. Hell, Total Package, Screw You, and the Sidewinder have put me to defeat. Every match offers something different. Surely, I my run will come to an end pretty soon BUT my dart board is set up now thanks to "Hurricane" Mulgrew. I haven't practiced YET but I will be starting tomorrow, or maybe right now.

Coastal, don't be too hard on El Nino. I think he had a great match considering it was his first time in quite awhile. Don't worry about his TWO score. The Total Package has shot a zero before, and he wasn't trying to finish on a double......

The Executioner
 

Screw You Captain

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the dream is alive

A belated congratulations to the Captainon the 180. I'm sure there were witnesses...

Anyway, keep practising. You'll need a manager when you make the big leagues, and I'd like to have access to 40% of your winnings, and access to all the birds on the darts circuit.

I wonder what the darts equivalent of a puck bunny is. Oh right, here it is.
 

Home Brew

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Friday night at O'Hares

Ran into SideWinder who advised me of his concerns regarding certain players avoiding games. Apparantly the Executioner obviously needs additional time to practice on his new board at Casa Burns before risking his belt, and used the excuse of needing to visit the hot tub at the community centre to avoid playing. Sidewinder then challenged Ball and Chain Mulgrew to a match; his excuse was that his Missus would not let him out tonight.
A sanctioned match was hastily arranged against Double One Arnold. Despite Double One's ton to start off the match, Sidewinder found a way to win the set 2-1.
 

Captain Shamrock

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Welcome aboard.....pardon the pun...

Double One,

Now you are 'officially' in the rankings. Unfortunately, Sidewinder will still be ahead of you. You need to play Triple One in a match 'above ground'. The underground darts scene can be dangerous.

As for your other comments, they are completely untrue. I have had challengers coming from all over the globe to take me on. I am always willing to play, when the time is right. I thought there might have been a chance of getting some 'action' at home tonight, and I am not talking darts. This is a rare occurance and I would put any darts match on hold, if there is any possiblity. It paid off. :) Before I digress(too late, I know), I will be more than willing to put up my title, as long as I have more than 1 hours notice. Sidewinder and Hurricane(Ball/Chain) Mulgrew phoned me within 5 minutes of each other requesting my company for a darts match. I had Brian "Scud Missile" Sweeney wander into my room after school demanding a sanctioned title match. Most of you would think that I would decline, after a hard day of teaching, but I didn't. I focussed and came out on top 2 - 1. Scud had a very nice finish of 71 in the second match, but that was as close as it got............

I am sure next Saturday will cause some shifting in the rankings, so I might make all my matches UNSANCTIONED for that evening, if we win the league of course. If we don't win the game, I have no reason to drink and come off the wagon for a night. This is enough incentive for me to make sure we do win that game.

I must go now and finish with my daily 45 minute workout before icing my elbow, forearm, and wrist. Wanking can be very strenuous, like dart playing. :)

Captainwhoistoolazytoeditnow
 
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